Day 14

Today I decide to be wealthy.

I responded to an ad on Craigslist for a serving position yesterday, and got scheduled for an interview today!

I also got my the rest of my job applications for the week done this morning (Whole Foods and Ross).

My daughters took me shopping for interview clothes.  I got a black skirt.  They were so sweet, picking out beautiful sweaters for me.  The only who paid at the register gave me a dirty look--it was 40% off, so it was way below what they'd budgeted for.  So now I have a skirt for my interview.  One of the sweaters was a green version of the red one I already have, but I didn't get it, or any of the others either.  I have an outfit now for the interview.  Wish I'd had my hair cut, but I'll go do that after the interview.

I am going to miss the girls so much.  I'll miss their energy, their voices, the sounds that they make as they run water or walk around, their conversations, their beauty.  I've been very, very fortunate to have time with them while they were here.  Tomorrow is our last full day, and then they leave early Monday morning, until April, perhaps.  I'm never prepared for empty nesting; the house cries for attention.

Today I decide to be wealthy.

Day 13

Today I decide to be wealthy.

I went to Worksorce, as my iMatch account was frozen, again, and got the account unfrozen and updated my information on it.  I got a job referral while I was there, and overheard the people in the next booth.  The guy was having trouble with his unemployment claim.  I asked my assistant about mine, but she referred me to the phone line.

I saw Deb (one of the supervisors) on the way out, and told her about the affirmation and this blog.  She reminded me that the actor Jim Carrey did such a thing, and that it was a new year.  We both agreed that there were some areas of my life where I am very wealthy.

As I told her at one point in the conversation, I'm running out of tiers and tears.

Today I decide to be wealthy.

Day 12

Today I decide to be wealthy.

I went to the website for State of Oregon: Unemployment, and read:

 Filing Deadline for Emergency Unemployment Compensation Extended

 On Friday, December 23, 2011, the President signed a bill extending the Emergency Unemployment Compensation (EUC) extension program. The bill does not add additional funds, or tiers, to the EUC program; it extends the filing dates in which an individual can apply for EUC, or move on to the next tier.

The extension allows individuals to file a new EUC claim, or to establish a new tier of benefits, through the week ending March 3rd, 2012.


I went to check my unemployment claim:

How much time and money do I have left in my claim?
Your weekly benefit amount is:	$	228	Program: EUC
Your remaining balance is:	$	245
The above balance shows the Federal Emergency Unemployment Compensation benefits potentially payable on your claim.
Your claim expired on 07/03/2010
Extensions are additional benefits payable only when you do not qualify for regular unemployment insurance benefits in this state, or in any other state or Canada. If you do qualify, you will be required to file a new claim, even if you have a balance remaining on your extension. File a new claim. There are currently four tiers to the EUC extension program. If you qualify for an additional tier of EUC, it will be automatically added to your claim. The last week payable under the EUC program is the week ending June 9, 2012. Should you use up all EUC benefits, contact your UI Center to determine your eligibility for additional benefits. I have no idea what tier I'm on.  I'm glad that I had work, so I know I'm getting a paycheck in January. I'm feeling dread and panic as I reread this.  I'm grateful I've had work most of this year,  that I've had time to go to my daughter's graduation and have holidays with them, and I hope that next year, 2012, "unemployment" will be a line on my regular paystubs, somewhere below FICA.   Today I decide to be wealthy.

Day 11

Today I decide to be wealthy.

We visited my mom.  She works as a volunteer at the Portland Art Museum.  Adult tickets are $15 each, but mom's a volunteer, so we got in free.  Afterwards, we went to a late lunch in a hotel, and the food was very tasty.  My sister Cathy picked up the tab.  And I got to ride the MAX (light rail) and have some time with my mom in the adventure.  My mom is healthy, and my sister lives with her, and they take care of each other.  I just show up, my kids with me, and enjoy.

We went back to Salem, where yesterday my daughters went out and raked up the leaves in my mother-in-law's back yard.  (We got there late Monday night, and spent Tuesday afternoon raking and today at the museum.)  My mother-in-law cheerfully fed us and housed us, and was very happy to have us, and gave my daughter who has a car gas money, so I had an all-expense paid vacation with people and places I love.

How rich I am.

Today I decide to be wealthy

Day 10

Today I decide to be wealthy.

I read an article in the Ensign, about the Lord's Prayer, and specifically the sentence, "give us this day our daily bread."  It talked about our needs, and how during the 40 years in the wilderness, that the Children of Israel received manna, and once they were in the Promised Land, they were expected to grow their own food (with the Lord's help--they planted, toiled, harvested, and were expected to tithe and share with others,  in the Lord's way).  One of the points of the article being that we don't know from day to day in our lives what it's going to be.

When I was at my daughter's college graduation this summer, one of the speakers said, "All the money in the world belongs to God," and, after promises of prospering, he said, "Prosperity has nothing to do with money."

So I don't know where I'm going to be financially when this is all done, but I do have my health, my family, my kids are home for a few days, my extended family is doing fine, I received Christmas money enough to pay household bills (but not enough to pay the health insurance, so that's going bye-bye until I can get a job that either has it or that I can afford to pay out of pocket, or the Oregon Health Plan), and food from the church.  

I know that the Children of Israel got so used to the manna that they complained about it.

How can you complain about manna?  (I really don't want to know the answer to that.)

Today I decide to be wealthy.

Day 9

Today I decide to be wealthy.

Wow, it's been more than a week now.

Yesterday I opened the January Ensign, and read the First Presidency message. The theme was A,B,C.  Attitude, belief, courage.  So I'm working on that now.  And this morning when I read a bit in Alma, I came to this realization, which I posted on Facebook.  (I'll take it down in an hour or so.) 

I finally figure out something. I was reading about faith, repentance and good works, and I was thinking, "Faith, hope and charity..." and it dawned on me: Faith is faith; good works is charity (giving of alms, clothing poor, etc., the pure love of Christ, which is selfless giving and empathy for others), so therefore, hope must be repentance.

I am working on repentance; or rather, I am in the process of repentance, or getting my life on the strait and narrow path of financial responsibility. I just didn't think of this activity as that.  Another thing I'm concerned about it something we learned about in a psychology class, that is that sometimes observing something produces an extra influence on the subject being witnessed.  In psychology class, that's not a good thing.  But this is different, in that daily reporting reinforces the project and can help the project stay on track, so, nine days on the track, and Evans said do it for sixty, so fifty-one days left to see where I'll be. 

I don't think that I'll be doing a paper chain count-down, though it is an amusing idea.

This blog/activity is about financial responsibility, but I know from reading weight-loss stories that other things are affected too.  Got some bills paid--last month's power and garbage bill, this month's water and internet.

Today I decide to be wealthy.

 

 

Christmas Day

Today I decide to be wealthy.

It's Christmas.  I am wealthy in family matters and in having enough to pay my bills this month and chocolate.  We went together to church and had the Sacrament together, something I'd wanted as a child, and have had the blessing of over and over again as an adult.  I even got to talk to my sister today, whom I haven't talked to on the phone in ages.  (Long story.)

Tomorrow, I will work on my goals for the next part of my life, which include employment, finances, and talents (getting the books written), cleaning out the sewing room and reducing the clutter in my life (including the never-ending mess in the pantry).

I bought some New Year Cards to send to people, and those are part of the plan tomorrow, too.  Wealthy people write to other people and send tokens of remembrance.

Today I decide to be wealthy.

Saturday

Today I decide to be wealthy.

I have time to spend with my children and husband, I am still in the same house, my mom and mother-in-law sent us money, so I can pay bills and have a nice Christmas, I belong to a church that takes care of its own, so we have good food to eat, my Savior knows my name, I have my eyes to see with, my ears, I have a body that works, I got to see my brother and niece today, I got to go shopping, I still have a few days to pay the garbage and other bills, I have gas in the car.  I have everything I need for the day.  I made homemade mac and cheese for the twins dinner, and tomorrow we will have bacon and sausage and waffles and starfruit juice, and presents and the Sacrament, and home again for hamburgers and the Hansens brought us over a New York cheesecake and a jar of lemon curd.

Today I  decide to be  am wealthy.

Friday

Today I decide to be wealthy.

I wrote an update/holiday note to my counselor at Worksource, letting her know what was going on.
  
I read the book "The 5 lessons A Millionaire Taught Me About Life and Wealth,"  is is about changing one's attitude through  positive affirmation. "I decide to be wealthy."  It also has lessons on compound interests, and making money on one's time off. which the author did in real life, and now has the "Christmas Box" series of books, among other things, and I appreciate that Evans didn't go the motivational speaker money route, but actually produced products that people enjoy using.   It's a short read, and I'm trying it out and blogging about it, but part of the back of my head has the Saturday Night Live skits about positive affirmations.

She thanked me for the update, no comment on the book report, and offered hers and Worksource's services again.

I spent most of the day writing three articles for the neighborhood newsletter, including researching on the net and calling a couple of the places for info.  One of them (the bus system) had inaccurate information on their websites, so they're going to get it corrected now that we've discussed it.  I also went shopping with my youngest daughter, and talked to my mom.  My sister-in-law, whose baby isn't even two years old yet, may have cancer.
I stayed up too late last night, and it was just stupid stuff, going over and over the same sites, like some sort of addiction or "I don't wanna go to bed."  I did come up with the topics and did some research on them.  Have to get more done tomorrow.

Again, procrastination is not a habit to build wealth.  I should have had these articles done Thanksgiving week, and I still have three job applications to find and fill out.  Unemployment benefits have been extended again, but I still need to find a job, so that that news is something that's mildly interesting, instead of being some thing to worry over.

Today I decide to be wealthy.

Thursday

"Today I decide to be wealthy."  Repeat morning and night, and during the day, whenever.

Affirmations are nothing new.  The Greatest Salesman in the World was very popular in the '70's, and I think my dad even had a copy of it.  I got a copy of it when I was in Eugene or Logan, and tried doing it, and failed by the second chapter.  One of my friends, a former missionary, said that the affirmation sentences were all put together and was basically a mission chant.  She wasn't even aware that there was a book, let alone the preaching published for each affirmation.

Saturday Night Live mocked affirmations I'm Good Enough, I'm Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me!: Daily Affirmations With Stuart Smalley, is still available on-line.  The author of that is now in politics; you have to believe in yourself pretty good to have that job.

But I'm still going to try this one--  Today I decide to be wealthy.  (Not become, but to be.)

One of the other things in the book was about "making money in the margins."  I'm a trained writer; I've sold a short story and a children's puzzle, so I'm also a published one, even though it was decades ago.  I should be using this talent to make some money.

And goodness knows, I still have Sister B.'s book to do, the family history books and the neighborhood newsletter, all today.







 

4th post

Yesterday, I didn't do a very good job of being wealthy.  I don't think that spending an hour playing a game on msn is a wealthy way to spend time, but I did it anyway.

Decide.  I keep thinking of "today I choose to be wealthy."  Well, maybe "choose" might be a better selection, but "decide" is what happens after choice.  Eenie, meenie, minie, choose, I decide this.

Today was a bit better spent.  I got the presents and the paperwork ready for Park and Rec and drove up there.  The bronze deer at the round-a-bout were decorated with wreaths and ribbons, and the buck had a red clown nose on, and its eyes had a different, glaring look that I didn't recall in the summer.

The parking lot had so few cars in it, and the receptionist sent me back to my former supervisor's office.  There were Christmas cards and decorations and a tree in the lunch room.  There were about ten who were hanging out, waiting for the 4 p.m. dismissal.  They ignored me, but the group at the table in the trailer all said, "Hi, Barb!"  when I walked in.  So it was nice, and my supervisor was happy to see me.

I mailed my time sheet, deposited some Christmas checks, bought vegetables for the diner.

We had dinner with another family, who lives down the road.  I remember when she was afraid of losing her house a few years ago.  Her mom was moved out a nursing home into her house, and she took care of her, and was paid to do it.  When her mom died, her husband got a full-time job, and a couple of her children moved home, and had jobs, helping to pay the mortgage, and the stress and fear seemed to be gone.

Today I decide to be wealthy.  

One of my daughters is making a gingerbread castle, and the dog is begging for someone to play with her, and I finally mended some clothes (and forgot to mend some others), and I made the royal frosting, and tomorrow I will get up and call and write and do work that I've been procrastinating.  I put up a small tree on the table in the front room, a stuffed toy one, and I ran Christmas lights around it, so now it seems a bit more like Christmas.

To my mind, the wealthy do not procrastinate.  

Another day

So now it's been a few days. 


I need to get my hair cut, clean the house, write thank yous, deposit a check, pay a bill, make the bed, and so forth.  And find a job and file my unemployment, er, underemployment claim from last week.  Sunshiny day outside, and we had food to eat, hot water, etc.

Speaking of hot water, the power bill was horribly high last month, probably from me trying to get warm after getting home from work, by staying too long in the shower and turning on the wall heater so that the bathroom would be warm, which it wasn't at times, as someone would come in, and turn on the ceiling fan and leave the bathroom door open.  Not one of these would help me become wealthy.

I'll be taking stuff back to the library that was due today.  I could put on "renew," but that gets old.  Besides, the yoga magazine is taking up room and is putting off a definite odor of guilt--it's suggestion to become a new person is to get out of bed early in the morning, and don't linger.  Hellooo, it's doubtless very warm in the morning there, but it's pretty chilly here, and a warm bed for a while there was the only time all day I'd feel like I wasn't on the verge of freezing.  Although I do like the idea of becoming a new person, one who does yoga and eats healthy and looks like it.

Part of being wealthy yesterday was to go through the fridge and prepare the vegetables, so that carrots, celery, etc. were all on plates, ready to eat, top shelf.  Healthy, healthy, healthy!  And I made sour cream cookies.  Not healthy.

So today, husband is at work (hurray!), and I have the house stuff to do.

Today I decide to be wealthy.  Which means today, to get somethings in order.  And paid.  Looking at the date, it's also the last day to send Christmas cards.  Which is why I usually send "Happy New Year" cards. 

And "today" means "today, I will stay off the computer for the next 6 hours and do many routine and necessary things, after I file with the state."  After all, I did work 19 hours last week (rounded up) and earn $209.25.  Which I will be paid for in January, and which will be deducted from this latest claim, as it should be.

Today I decide to be wealthy.  And it's almost 11:30 a.m.
 

Third day. Definitions.

Monday, December 19

Today.  I decide. To be. Wealthy.

Today.  Okay, that means "not the past," and it sure doesn't mean that old joke, "Today is the first day of the rest of your life."  It means "today."  I keep hanging on to a lot of crap of hurt of why I'm not financially in better shape, and I've got to let it go.  I've even gone to a 12-step program to deal with my anger and disappointment about the choices I've made in my life.  So I've got let it go, and just deal with today.  And not be like the totally irresponsible song, "Today while the blossoms still cling to the vine," which is about ditching the person that the singer is singing too, and anyway, it's winter, so no blossoms.  There are a thousand platitudes about "today."  Just deal with it.  Whatever!

I decide.  My responsibility is to take care of myself.  However, I'm also taking care of my immediate family.  I'm afraid, though, that this responsibility to take care of myself means that others will be dumped, like in A Cambodian Odyssey, when in the chapter, "The Selfish and the Dying," that people deserted their spouses when they were unable to keep walking.  The person would be on the ground, calling out, "Sweet!  Sweet!" to their life partner, who would shrug and keep walking   No dumping.  I need to decide to take responsibility for the stuff I'm supposed to be doing.  Like know what the health insurance covers and what it doesn't and get the paper work in and the bills paid.

To be.  Not "or not to be."  To be in the moment.  And then my former supervisor calls and wants to know when will I ever get that paperwork turned in that's a month late?  And the neighborhood association president wants the newsletter to get ready for January by Dec. 23.  I'm always a bit shocked that there's a day after Dec. 31st.  I guess it shows in my lack of life planning.

Wealthy.  Define wealthy.  I'm wealthy in that I actually have land around my house, and a nice woodlot next door, and not living in some jammed-together neighborhood.  I have a nice dog.  I have a nice husband who worries over the dog.  My mother-in-law sent money for Christmas, so I can now pay utilities.  I have my health, my husband has his, so he's able to fix himself breakfast and dinner.  The car works.  There's money for gas.  The girls are all healthy, and have nice lives at the moment.

So for the purpose of this blog, to be wealthy would mean that

• I have my bills paid 
• I have employment to be able to sock some money away for the next illness or bout of unemployment
• I have three months worth of living expenses saved,
• I have the funds to go to the next college graduation and a job that will allow me to go. 
• I have my health, including lower blood pressure and less weight and better grooming.  
• That I look like I'm wealthy in that I'm neatly dressed and I don't look like a slob. 
• And if we have to live in an apartment, that it isn't a creepy stinky noisy one.  
• And some health insurance, please. I'd like to go skiing on the free ski days at Hoodoo and not worry about what would happen if my husband and I break our legs.
• My gall bladder surgery is paid off
• The student load is paid off

So though I'm not there yet, I'd like to be headed in that direction by the end of these two months.

First day of blog, second day of test

The 5 lessons A Millionaire Taught Me About Life and Wealth by Richard Paul Evans, is a small book, featuring five keys for financial success.  I'm going to put the first key to the test.  And I'm going to keep a record, to see if and how it works.

You, dear reader, are invited to tag along.

For the first key, Evans suggests writing "Today I decide to be wealthy," and put it someplace where I will read it, morning and night, and someplace else, like next to my credit card, where I will see it often.  Personally, I think that the credit card suggestion was suppose to be a reminder not to use the credit card, and I don't have anymore credit cards, just my unemployment Reliacard.  Instead, I've put a sticky note on my computer screen, and have it here where I can see it, and be reminded every time I log on.

I am to do this for two months.  So we'll see where I'm at on February 18, 2012.

So here I am now.  I am underemployed, living in Bend, Oregon, which has been in recessions more than other parts of the country.  I am 55 years old.  My husband and I got a bankruptcy lawyer, who told us that we don't need to file, as we have no assets to protect.  My husband has a vocation, but it's in construction, so we are really, really sunk.  We get food boxes from the church.  Fortunately, our children are grown, though they still aren't on their own, as they are in college, on grants, scholarships and loans.

I am a college graduate, though I don't put what year on my job applications.  I graduated in Journalism/Public Relations.  I had a bit of a career of it, before I got married and moved here. I realized my career was dead in the water, when I went to bid on a PR job, and was asked if I had a modem and a fax machine.  No.  What I had instead was this:  three preschool children, a house going through major renovations, a car that was always needing repairs, no money, no extended family to help me, and a husband whose own career needed constant attention. It's been twenty years since that day, and my PR jobs have been volunteer work with the local school's PTA, helping out with press releases for a couple of events at the church, writing a few articles for the neighborhood association newsletter, and working behind a cash register at the local Kroger.

Did I mention that the cash register gig has been over with for over two years?  (That the family had employer-paid health and dental insurance?) That's how long I've been un- and underemployed. Fortunately, I'm not what is referred to as a 99er, as I've had temporary jobs, both part-time and full-time.  But I don't see any end to the crushing financial mess we're in now.

At the end of his book, Evans says one of his purposes of writing is to give hope.

I would like some hope.  I would like to hope that next year. I'll be someone putting Christmas presents on the church and community's "angel trees."  I'd like to hope that I'll have the resources to visit my daughters when they graduate from college.  I'd like to hope that this mess will get under control, and that I will pay off my medical bills, have decent health insurance and keep up with my utilities and other household bills and get ahead in my finances.

I'd like to hope that my hopes will be fulfilled.

Please.